:: punched, drunk and loved ::

Samstag, Dezember 24, 2005

ho ho ho merry x'mas!

and it's the time of the yr to do a major stock-taking (no no i'm not talking abt the presents).. but to reflect and laugh at how u foolishly spent a yr thus far..

for me, some things are definitely looking better. from last yr, from half a yr ago. i feel happier doing the things i do, learning to say 'no', learning to love myself more (no no NOT from an egoist pt pf view), the making of certain choices which might've seem a puzzlement to other people at first do turn out to be right after all. well, at least i think they're right. i hope. *beams*

some things are still not moving in the direction that i want them too. but "be thankful for small mercies", i will continue to learn to accept certain truths and not-so-natural occurences. and pray for more patience from myself.

so yes, i seldom.. actually no. i nv did this b4. new yr resolutions. new yr new hope. hopefully things will only get better for me and you and everyone else!

i'll love myself even more. becoz no one will love me as well as i do.
i'll be motivated.
i'll stop building perfect illusions of other people.
i'll start saving.
i'll be responsible for myself. and stop trying to be responsible for other people.

wells. that shud be enough to work on alr'd right? 1 yr is really too short a time and each yr seems to be getting shorter and shorter. so may we not foolishly spend 2006 away. time supersonics u know? in fact, i think the quote of the year must be this...

"in 10yrs time, i'll become 31, still single, and still living in my parents' hse... !!!"

let's hope the last part wun come true. *shudders* i dun wanna walk down that same stretch of road in 10 yrs time, taking my 55 and u taking ur 53 and predicting wat we'll be in another 10 yrs. no matter wat, we'll get our own happening swinging singles pad. married/ attaches need not apply.

and just b4 i go away for the new yr season.. here's wishing everyone too a very happy new yr!

dun forget to pull ur ear ~

it was |11:33:00 PM|

Montag, Dezember 19, 2005

i never really concluded that trend of thought, did i?

truth be told, the vague speck in the distance disturbs me more than a blank, open face in the crowd. u can still see her details, run a stereotype, even if u dun really know wat's going on in her head. and she's always there, looming large as life.

but the speck in the distance, once u discover it, is the dirt, the irritating fly which never goes away. and disturbs u to a magnitude u nv realised urself.

becoz admit it, the things that haunt u the most are really the small, not-so-significant incidences which is each, only a slight blip in this long journey of ur life. it keeps bugging u. it'll nv be solved. all the could it bes. what ifs. what if i'd put in more effort. what if i said otherwise. what if it wasn't me. what if we meet again. could it be this. could it be that.

it was |12:21:00 AM|

Sonntag, Dezember 18, 2005

i was a big loser at the tender age of three. or was it two? a fat and furry carebear came to shake hands with me. it wanted to hug me even. (oh the blasphemy!) but i cried and screamed and kicked it away.

and that was my traumatic childhood. 2 days ago, i chanced upon this (with carine, sue and hui'en of coz! *beams*) and recalled my traumatic past.

wat're u thinking of now?

i'm thinking of the poor part-timer teenager in that stupid stuffy carebear suit 18 yrs ago. he must've grown much older, gotten married, have some kids of his own. and maybe even brought them to the crowd that day. maybe we'd even rubbed shoulders with one another. and he'll never realise the impact he had on my childhood formation.

or maybe he did, and secretly laughed at the poor kid in the stupid stuffy suit now. who knows, who knows.

it was |9:42:00 PM|

Freitag, Dezember 16, 2005

he has yet stepped out/ for a hundred days and a hundred nights

he hides behind the door, unnoticed
for a hundred days and a hundred nights
waiting hithero, for the girl to take him out

he dreams of days, long gone
when he could get dirty, making mad mad love
to the green green grass
and they'ld bask in the warm glow, of the settling sun

he is consumed by such desires, tho'
knowing full well that under the first veil of darkness
the crazy and the beautiful will dance
and trample, upon his very heart and soul

the strawberries and champagne, his delusions
the fat chicken legs, his hallucinations
the ravishing, the game
the coterie girls, his cross to bear

so girls, what says thou?

it was |12:18:00 AM|

u see the two girls in front?

u see the green top at the back?
it's one of my favouritest.

one of them (i dunno which one. but suckers always cover up for each other) has lost it.

so the next time u see any of the faces, do me a favour. punch it.

it was |12:02:00 AM|

Sonntag, Dezember 11, 2005

holiday reads 101

am i disturbed? insightful? or just plain weird?

i may be a li'l out of touch too, but jeff noon is my newest favouritest author! pixel juice is pure delight. urban fairytales. told in the most magical possibilities of language. i highly recommend this to anyone who's any of the combination of disturbed, insightful and weird. i'm gonna hunt for his other books too.

alright... and maybe it's FINALLY time to get started on the tech workshop thing. danette's the greatest procrastinator if there ever is an guiness entry for one.

but wait! it's time for lunch and someone's cooking a fabulous spread! i must go and show some moral support... haha

procrastinate
Etymology: Latin procrastinatus, past participle of procrastinare, from pro- [forward] + crastinus- [of tomorrow], from cras- [tomorrow]
transitive senses : to put off intentionally and habitually
intransitive senses : to put off intentionally the doing of something that should be done

it was |12:59:00 PM|

Mittwoch, Dezember 07, 2005

sad but true - nobody knows anybody.

it was |12:03:00 AM|